32

Of treats and meets

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Friday, December 22, 2006
What happens when you feel totally disoriented and low in life ?
You either post like this and make sure nobody understands or you decide to live through it and come out stronger, happier and all the more hyper dyperly recharged. I decided to do both ! :D
Get some animated character to throw a treat, crash there, and make them talk their brains out and leave him/her feeling "fundamentally screwed" :D You get good food plus entertainment for free !

And yes, if all you bloggers have nothing productive to do next Saturday, Crash here and end 2006 in a bajjistic way. Even if you have anything productive to do on the 30th, chuck it and land up at the Besant Nagar beach, spot the noisiest bunch of people near the police booth opposite to Cozy and join them wide eyed.
I've been to a small-scale-bajji-meet and can personally vouch for it to turn out to be an amazing fun experience ! If you have nothing to say, just nod to whatever others say, smile sheepishly and gobble those bajjis !

For Dumbos - CLICK HERE

P.S : Yes, I've decided to make bold statements ! :D :D

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20

Twisted times

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Monday, December 18, 2006
Warning : This post is filled with pessimism and negative emotions. The reason is for me to vent it and for you not to take it personally ! Amen ! Now read it fellow banshees ! :D

What happens when you create an impression on people ? You are expected to live upto it everytime and if you happen to degrade, your life is made miserable and worth perishing. So does that mean one has to underplay everytime. Life can't be put on stealth settings. We are always expected to do things and expectations lead to disappointments most of the times.
I've mentioned a lot about hope during the course of my posts and as I write and experience more, I realize that hope is a misnomer. Everyone in this world is a selfish soul. They want only things done for themselves. They would contact you only with a reason. All I ask is, what is wrong in keeping in touch? Lack of time? Absolute crap. How long does it take to drop in a "how are u?" Obviously I wouldn't flourish you with a long screed like reply for that! Selfish and reckless souls.
And why, most of them won't even comment on such posts. Guilt strikes I suppose? They'd have 14327 reasons ready at hand to attack you with, before you could ask why! And they'd even call you jobless to keep in touch. Well, if I have to pretend to be "busy" or appear aloof, I'd rather not get in touch with anyone.
This haughty attitude of people pisses me off so much.
Go party people ! The whining is done. The heart remains cleansed and pure as ever!

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14

Random Ramblings 2

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Sunday, December 17, 2006 in
I know I'm sitting jobless and still have a trillion and a half things running on my mind. My current state of mind is so haphazard that I can't even bring it out in the form of words. No no, these aren't my mood swings. Call it multi-tasking, a writer's block or simply the lack of ability to streamline one's thoughts and think coherently to put up a proper post. In simple words, call it just an excuse.
The rate at which am watching movies has reached its zenith and the rate of socializing and networking has perfectly balanced my state of ennui. With the newly acquired musical collection, I couldn't be more busy!
Have you ever felt that you could be surrounded by a huge group of chattering people, yet felt lonesome ? And be with one person and find hours evaporating into seconds ? (Chi chi, not lowe, perverts!)
And why is it that when you need people around, all of them are either busy or not reachable or are onto things that obviously make u feel measly.
I don't wish to live in this moment !
Hope is a misnomer !

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31

One Minute of Fame

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Sunday, December 10, 2006 in ,
One of the most eagerly awaited event for all PSBB'ians used to be the yearly anniversaries that were(are) conducted religiously at the Kamaraj Memorial Hall. It was looked forward not to showcase our pathetic theatrical skills, not even for the additional 2 marks that would increase our abysmally low mid-term scores,  neither to prove ourselves the best of the 3 branches and not even to grab an opportunity to disappear from those monotonous social science classes; but just for the sheer heck of it. Being a face in the crowd, and getting acclaimed (as the little speck in the crowd!) provided the much required boost to our deflated egos.

I'm sort of proud to declare that I used to participate every year and enjoyed every moment of it. Or so I thought! I still don't know what to do with all those ridiculous costumes. I don't have the heart to get rid of it. I remember the way teachers used to goad us into participating by telling us that the play would be a disaster if there was just Cruella and no puppies. And we used to wag our backsides all day in the name of rehearsals ! Of course the popular senior whose parent was friends with the dean got the role of Cruella. And boy, was she good!

During the 3 day event, the opulent celebrities sat in the front row wearing their plastic smiles throughout the coruscating performaces, while parents swooned in the audience at the sight of their son/daughter playing the dalmation pup! (Though I'm sure they had no clue as to which one was theirs!) As for us, we sat huddled backstage wearing our comical costumes and a pungent layer of make-up that made us look like baboons and added to our teenage skin issues. By the time we'd go on stage, all the make-up would have formed sweaty patches and we'd look nothing like cute puppies but more like leprosy patients.

Despite all the rigmarole that it was, it all seems like an epoch now. From being a face in the crowd to becoming the snooty senior who played the lead role, I've somehow enjoyed every minute of my fame.

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25

19, so what ?

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Friday, December 08, 2006
From throwing tantrums as a toddler,

To bratting around on my bicycle as a 10 year old,

Having the first real crush* at 15,

Today, turning 19 doesn't seem such a big deal at all !

Chocolate cakes anyone? :D

*Questions pertaining as to who it was, are strictly prohibited ! :D :D

Thanks Visithra and Pree

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25

Euphoria

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Monday, December 04, 2006 in
She spread her hands on either sides away from her body and kept it in line with her slender shoulders with her palms facing upwards. A long breath escaped her lungs. She inhaled the sweet intoxicating smell of the damp earth beneath her feet. The fresh ubiquitous aroma filled her lungs and released a new wave of energy from inside her that traveled to every inch of her body. She was in a trance. She squished her foot into the mucky mud and curled her toes inwards taking in a lump of mud between her toes. Her eyes saw the beauty enveloping her and there was so much to see. She closed her eyes and let out a huge breath of content. At that very moment, she felt the first few drops of rain on her face trickling down her smooth skin onto her neck.

Her palms cupped instantly to puddle little of the purest form of water. She tried to hold them, but they trickled down from between her fingers. Her clothes stuck to her body as if they were her second skin. She could take it no more. It was an entirely euphoric moment.


And when she opened her eyes a few minutes later, there were half a dozen people gaping at her from the bus stop.


Pic Courtesy : Fotosearch

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19

You care too much!

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Friday, December 01, 2006
"Alright, I've had enough ! Stop it", she screamed !
"Oh come on, just this once ! What's wrong with you now?" I coaxed her for more.
This once? Don't you remember the last time you colored me ? Burgundy streaks to make you look more chic. Atleast that's what you claimed ! Now you want it highlighted blonde. Did you even take a look at how much volume you have lost in the last few years? What all tortures you put me through ! You straightened me for your 21st birthday,you wanted a new look to begin your 20's. You permed me because your loverboy thought your face looked too oblong with straight hair. Beautiful curls everyone cooed in. Once you started working, maintaining the curls became too much of a pain. You got it undone and did the layer cut which the stylist blew totally and I looked as if a rat had played with me. You'd keep chucking a clump of strands behind your ears till I'd be damp from sweat. You would chew me when your anxious, bind me with all those fancy clips, let me fly when you're on the bike. Serums and lotions you applied to manage me, but I asked for none. Shampoos and conditioners galore you used, thinking none suited your texture. Rebonding is the only solution someone suggested and you blew half your salary with that. I longed for the hot oil massage and a good rinse, and you gave me vinegar, mehandi, eggs, curd, lemon and even beer in return ! And now you ask me what's wrong?
I call it a bad hair day !

P.s : The I above isn't me ! :D

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25

Matching Issues

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Tuesday, November 07, 2006
Some things in college life have left me skeptical or should I call them issues that make my jaws hit the ground ?
After already mentioning the amount of metal (a.k.a junk jewelry) on girls in a previous post, the issue that has me pondering now is of synchronous colors ! Seems like the "matching- matching" fever would never leave the city. Everything from the hair clip to the footwear seems to be of the same color as their clothes. To top it all, some even go to the extent of wearing the same shade of nail polish and lipstick and if possible and considering availability, flowers too! Have I mentioned that how strong perfumes and fragrances put me off ?
On questioning a patient (read as college going girl) why she was holding her books in her hands, she claimed to not own a bag matching her clothes ! Hmph ! I mean, how can they do it every single day ?!?
I don't say that its wrong to get dressed up.But shouldn't one keep the place and occasion in mind? And that doesn't mean that I don't like to apply make up or am against color cosmetics. I don't feign to be plain Jane either. I admit, I feel incomplete without my eyes darkened with that line of kajal or kohl and would never miss it every morning.
Well, to wrap it up in a nutshell - I seek beauty in simplicity !

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23

Dear Diary...

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Wednesday, November 01, 2006 in
Memories leapt out at Vikram out of his diary as he flipped the memoirs in ink. Sitting at his oak paneled study, elbows propped up against the smooth wood, fingers knit together and eyes absorbing all that they could in the harsh light against the diary.

October 27th 2004
... Maldives is so beautiful. Every minute spent here is going to be etched in my memory. The calm beaches, the mellow wind and of course Rina.I love everything about her. That smooth skin, that mysterious smile,those dark eyes, that lovely dimple, the shy laughter.. Thank you God for having entwined our lives.....

August 11th 2005
We just moved into this new palace of a house. Rina has so tastefully furnished it. But still, she should have listened to me about that lighting idea. The room looks a little too dull and gloomy. Well, yeah, we had a fight. i can't bear to see those eyes teary. Let me go and cheer her up...

October 23rd 2005
.... Its our first anniversary today. We went to the temple and just returned. Can't tell you how happy I am today. I hope this joy lasts forever. I never could want anything else in life. I'm so content. Must get ready now for the party. Rina's already ready....

December 8th 2005
.... Rina is 3 months pregnant. I can't believe there is going to be a little Vikram/Rina soon in this house. Must start working on those name and nappy issues. She wants a girl though...

Vikram turned a fresh page in his diary to chronicle a new entry. His hands trembled as he held the pen against the paper. He couldn't form the words. They somehow seemed to refuse to get to his hands from his head. He leaned back against the leather chair and closed his eyes tight. He let the tears flow. He was enveloped by memories. Sounds filled his ears. Her laughter, her voice, screaming, noises and bang the crying of an infant.

July 1st 2006
Rina left the world today and all I have is her token of love to me that looks so much like her. I miss you !

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22

The Adventures of Tinkerbells

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Friday, October 27, 2006
"As the exams near, the frequency of posts increase exponentially"
- The Bloggers Rule

Study holidays make a great time to watch movies, socialize, chat, blog, sleep longer hours and yes, try to include dusting books, and taking copies of notes too ! I'm sure I'll burn a huge hole in my dad's pocket with the amount I'm spending on Xerox.

Anyways, on the weather front, this year is no different from the last. Those of you who have frequented this place would know about my Relief Camp!! Tinkerbells has become a bad cat now. Being fat and thrashing others seem to have become his passion or rather obssession. He pawed a little girl when she tottered to him with a bowl of milk in the rain. And yes, he still hasn't learnt to climb a tree (being a bit fat lump of flesh, how can he). I see a few kittens on the tree branches from my window meowing all night with Tinkerbells sitting guard under the tree. I must introduce him to my dogs sometime!

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16

Of labs and lights

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Tuesday, October 17, 2006 in
The last fortnight of the semesters are usually hectic, with every laboratory staff demanding for the record and observation book to be signed. Sounds simple if you're not the procrastinating types. I'm in the last lap of my record-a-thon. Finally my room is not zooming with A4 sheets anymore. And I don't have any brothers like Sagaro who'd offer a hand atleast at drawing those boxes in the microprocessor record! (hmph!)
The most dreaded, uninvited exams commence in about 3 week's time and the rate of my cribbing would touch its zenith in a week atleast ! So, I'll give you all some peace and not post anything until the kids next door stop bursting crackers !
Anyways let's look at the brighter end of week. Diwali of course ! No lectures on Child labour ! (Do buy crackers- atleast the kids would get the money for all those nauseous toxins they work hours with, to give us those few seconds of happiness !)
I'd like to wish everyone reading this a colorful, prosperous and a happy diwali !
I'll bug you all after diwali, till then, eat all the sweets you can and get fat.
P.s: This blog is best viewed in Firefox

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20

Of pain and pleasure

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Friday, October 13, 2006
A fortnight back I got this big urge to get my ear pierced for a second earring. No particular reason, but I just felt like it.
I was all excited until I reached the place and saw the look on others faces while they got their piercing done. The way they cringed and oww'ed and yelped, pushed my morale down my gut. But then pain gives pleasure at times and I reminded myself how this was my sole decision. So I sat down cross legged in front of the man who was to take a chunk (ahem!) of my flesh. Some cream(supposedly) was oozed in order to ease the pain. Seeing the look on my face that read -"Finish-the-damn-thing-fast" he held the cold metal earring against my skin and pressed. A sharp spasm of pain ran through my neck and I was squeezing my mother's palm as tightly as I could. My eyes were shut so tightly that I was sure I'd have tears in my eyes. But no! Before I could curse him for the useless anesthesia he gave, he said "Aachu, andha side" (finished, the other side now) Seeing the expression on my face, he turned my head to the other side and repeated the same thing. Did the man have no sympathy ?It was no better this time. And before I could comment on his lack of sensibility and the likes, the ordeal was over. I got up and gingerly touched my ear lobe. I felt nothing then, but after an hour or so, the so called pain started. They say it lasts for a week or so.
But I'm happy that I got what I like and good things don't come easy ! And today I agree that pain can give pleasure too!

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24

Weird Tag-3

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Monday, October 09, 2006
Prelude :- Its been ages since I handled a tag. Please bear with me ! Of course its also been quite a while since I put up a post, kindly adjust for that as well ! (:d)

Weird Quotient-1 : I have to clean out my entire room and get rid of something atleast in order to sit and spend some quality studying time ! (this happens very rarely though)

WQ-2 : I have to wear atleast 2 rings in my fingers. I can't write properly otherwise !

WQ-3 : I hate it when people ask me to repeat myself. (I have a low tolerance level) (just filling points... proceed on )

WQ-4 : I check my height and weight everyday ! (:p)

WQ-5 : Looking at everyone saying that they are talkative and can keep yakking, I find it weird to say that I'm not the really talkative types. I can get mundanely silent at times! (at times only!!!)

WQ-6 : And of course with so many people listing out their weird qualities, I feel I am pretty much sane and normal ! I find it weird to say that I'm weird !

And as usual, I'm not going to tag anyone and save the rest from the trouble. But in case you have nothing else to post, thou art most welcome to take up this tag! Amen !

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21

The Loud Silence

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Wednesday, October 04, 2006 in
She had always been the serene, non-troublesome, obedient and disciplined child that most parents wished for. She was all that everyone wanted her to be, not for herself, not for them, she never knew why. She was like a chameleon, disappearing into the background. Infact it took people a while to take in her presence while being in the same room as her.
The quiet child that she had been, nobody was able to point out with a precision as to when the silence had crept its way into her and rendered her mute. It had been a process in stealth. The surprising part was that the silence had never been accusing or intrusive. Neither had the silence been loud enough to acknowledge her presence. But the moment it arrived, it spread and consumed her.
Over years, the accusing silence blend itself into the surroundings and the physical presence was so meager that none realized when the eternal silence came. Much sooner than she anticipated. It all began and ended in an absolute zilch.

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22

Random Ramblings 1

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Sunday, October 01, 2006 in
Before anyone can ask, yes I feel a lot better and saner!
A wonderful fortnight of holidays comes to an end on wednesday and I can proudly say that I've no clue where my books are. All the pending work gets reminded only the night before and I stare blankly when people ask me - "What did you do during the holidays then?"

Anyways moving on, it really irritates me when people ask me about the comments on my blog. Yes. Initially one blogs for comments, all the "I blog for my satisfaction" is an absolute piece of farce. Who doesn't want that? But infact after being here for almost 2 years (technically) I've grown immune to the number of comments , not that I don't want them, I do value your opinion; but the number really doesn't matter to me now.
I've also been noticing that the length of my posts have been gradually increasing. If you've been around for long you'd know that I don't really pen down long posts. But now that I am, I'm liking it !
I've also been trying to tweak around with a different template, but its not turning out the way I want it. So that has to wait.
Thanks to Navratri and the celebrations, I met a few long lost kith and kins and spent some quality time with them.
Now I really wish that this semester comes to an end really soon.
*A proper post would follow soon*

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20

Meaning something or less

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Tuesday, September 26, 2006
Update 2 :- I was so lost in my thoughts that I forgot my own words, thanks Aravind for reminding ! :)
Update:- After smashing a candle stand, I feel much better. Thanks anyways! (:d)

There are these moments in my life that literally push me to the extent of thinking of my existence in this world. They make me question the truth and refuse to accept reality. And when these moments materialize before my eyes, I feel as if my character is getting altered to accommodate all that I wish not to.
Like a stone thrown in a calm lake, my neatly messed up mind is all rattled now. There are thoughts mostly useless and unnecessary that are swirling around in my mind like the foggy nights of winter. I'm wearing my temper on my sleeve and am lashing my words like a whip. Angry. Irritated. Melancholy.Disturbed.Sombre. Lonely. Emotional. Am totally at a low ebb. I'm not a very talkative person, especially about my emotions. But there are a few who can literally jog my mind before I voice it. They read my face, distinguish that tone in my voice, see that dampness amongst nothing in my eyes, comfort as I talk dumb words. They mean the world to me.
If this post made no sense to you, or if you think why I'm cribbing all this, I don't really care to be emphatic and explain myself now. If u still have faith in me,stand by, else flee.

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19

All I have is a

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Friday, September 22, 2006 in
For everything I've said and done,

For everything that made you run,

Everytime I hurt you bad

I'm sorry, I can't see you sad.


Now I'm mild & meek,

Forgiveness is all I seek,

I cast my eyes upon the ground,

Twiddle my thumbs, not making the slightest of sound.


I don't want to run, escape or hide !

I confront you dumb & mute

I'm so tongue-tied
And so I plead with only the soul so resolute.

You smile, I stutter

My limbs start to flutter

And all I have on my lips now is a simple Sorry.

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25

Friends Forever

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Tuesday, September 19, 2006 in
Dear God, in humbleness we pray to thee,
Show us your kindness and listen to our plea,
Someday, even the mightiest mountains may bend
But that day, pray, do not render us without a friend.
Someday, even the vast oceans may go dry,
But let not our hopes for the other go awry.
Someday, the sun may delve forever into the horizon
But let us embark on our journey, always in unison.
Someday, the green trees may all wither and choke,
But even then, let us be cozy in friendship's warm cloak.
Someday, the air itself will go thin and dissolve
But we will always hope for each other, this we resolve.
Someday, when all may seem lost and impossible
God, solve our problems and make the realities plausible
Someday, the world will rip itself apart in war
But even then we shall not be apart.
Wherever we are, whoever we may be
Whatever the time, however we may be
We shall live forever as friends, always together,
With love so strong and hopes for each other.

Psst: Am onto a poetry spree. Please put up with me ! Dedicated to a beloved friend, with love !

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26

Two sides of a Coin

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Saturday, September 16, 2006
She said,

I asked, you gave
I misunderstood
I did not listen, I heard
I lacked analysis
I was selfish
I became someone else
I ignored you
I blame myself

I underestimated us
I lost you
I lost my identity


He said,

You asked, I gave
I explained
I spoke
I judged
I was selfless
I searched your soul
You were gone
There is none to blame
I expected more
I sacrificed
I transform

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17

Ripe time

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Monday, September 04, 2006 in
She ran as fast as her legs would carry her on the hot sun-burnt field. The rain starved coarse earth made ruthless marks on the pink sole of her soft feet. Her silver anklets and glass bangles clinked in rhythm as she sped. She cut across all those green and yellow grasses that had grown almost as tall as her, making her way to where her secret lay. The wind laden with the fresh aura of the greenery and fertility caressed her soft face and lifted her long plait a few feet behind her waist. The lofty side curls bounced against the side of her face as she reduced her momentum and halted to an abrupt stop near the third scare crow from the right.
She bent over to its side and leaned over to check for any suspicious eyes. None. She opened the hay stuffed bag by the side and delved her hand deep inside to retrieve the letter her beloved had sent.After reading the scrawled handwriting for the nth time, she ran towards the muddy road and waited for the lone bus to arrive, of course late as usual.
The day had finally arrived. Her love was coming back !

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21

The Angel God sent

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Sunday, August 27, 2006 in
Manasa and Meghana aged 6 and 2 respectively, were the apple of their father's eyes. Bringing up the girls alone was a difficult task indeed for Mahesh. His wife passed away the moment Meghana came into this world. She was a replica of her mother with the same big fish like eyes and a dimple on the left cheek. Little Meghu always reminded Mahesh of his wife. He showered all the love in the world on his little girls. He didn't want them to feel the absence of their mother. But, Manasa was the mother's darling. She felt empty and always believed that she lost her mother because of her little sister. She used to take sadistic pleasure in pinching Meghana and seeing her cry. She wanted to be the centre of attention. But she found her father spending more time with her little sister and felt as if he was ignoring her. Manasa secluded herself from the two and spoke very less.
One fine morning, Mahesh saw Manasa steathily walk upto Meghana's room. Suspecting his elder one's actions, he followed her and saw her poke Meghana with a sharp pencil. The little one immediately shook out of its stupor and started wailing. Mahesh stopped Manasa in her tracks and slapped her for her insensitive behavior towards the child.
"I demand an explanation from you Manasa and I want it right now. " said Mahesh in a firm authoritative tone.
Manasa vented all her built-in fury. She screamed pointing at the wailing child "She sent Mummy to God, she killed my Mummy and ever since she came you have started hating me. You didn't congratulate me for coming first in class, you didn't come for my school anniversary program, you didn't....." and she burst into tears.
Mahesh immediately understood the girl's insecurity and kneeled down in front of her. Cupping her cherubic face in his hands, Mahesh said- "You are always special to me Manu, my eldest sweetheart. Its not that I don't love you, your sister needs my attention right now. I thought my Manu has become big enough to manage on her own. Both of your are like my 2 eyes, I can never say that I like only my left eye. You had your mother's love for 4 years of your life, your sister is deprived of that too. But she is so lucky to have a lovely big sister like you. Don't you have to make her feel special?"
At that very moment, Meghana climbed down her crib and tugged Manu's frock and in her baby language said "mama.. maaa"
Meghana picked up her little sister wiped her tears and said -" I'm sorry for everything Meghani, I'll be your mama from now, you're the angel God sent instead of Mama"
Mahesh looked at his 2 girls and a small tear escaped his eyes.

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32

Convince me !

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Monday, August 14, 2006
Me: Why now pa?
Dad: Why not now ? Earlier the better.
Me: Seri ok, but still I won't have the time for it.
Dad: Its just for 45 minutes a day, not the whole day ramya !
Me: But still, I'll have to wake up early every morning pa.
Dad:
You can always sleep after you come back na?

Me:
err... But still...

Dad: Epdiyum leave la vettiya thaane irukka? Car oatta kathunda enna ?
Me: !!!!!

And that's how my dad coaxed me into going for car driving lessons during my semester holidays and today; a month later, I'm typing this post with a beatific and proud smile on my face after clearing the driving test and holding the laminated card in one hand !

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21

Anandita

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Friday, August 11, 2006 in
From atop the bed, little Anandita asked her mother "Amma, do I really have to go?"
"Anu, it'll be great, trust me! You'll love your new school" said her mother as she parted her little one's hair and tied a ponytail on either side.
As she picked up the crisply ironed new grey and black pinafore and matching grey sock, Anandita remarked again, "Amma, will you come to pick me up in the evening?"
"Sure darling, I'll be there at the gates at 2 sharp" said the mother quickly stuffing chutney coated idlis into the constantly talking mouth.
With her water bottle sling on one side and a new bag hoisted firmly on her shoulders, Anandita said her prayers and before she could open her eyes, her father was carrying her to the car.
At the school gates, Anandita couldn't contain her tears.
"Big girls don't cry" reminded her mother.
Pulling her crutch together, little Anandita walked through the gates to her "School for the Disabled"


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5

Blocks & a promise

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Thursday, August 10, 2006
The more I try to be committed to blogging, the more enforced seem the posts. But for quite a while I seem to be suffering from what most of the fellow bloggers also do at some point or the other- the writer's block! I really appreciate the commitment with which certain people put up posts every single day without fail and kudos to the ones who religiously read them and comment!
But I promise to come up with something during the weekend and hopefully not a rusted piece of nothing !

A tag sounds so promising
now !

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13

Encounters

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Sunday, August 06, 2006
I've come across several characters in the last 18 years of my life. Some have made an impact, some have influenced me, some have just passed by, some have incurred my wrath, and a few are slotted in the top rung of my ladder of friends. A special place indeed.
According to me, friendship doesn't mean to be sticking together all day. The real test of friendship is the ability of a friend to rekindle the fire even after ages.

A bit of ego we might have had,
Numerous fights, some happy some sad,
Those lovely moments,
The many quarrels,
The various squabbles that are yet to come,
Making friendship even stronger in the long run.

I'm sure there will be more people walking in and out of my life. The above statements were made out of my little encounters with the souls branded as friends in my time of existence.

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15

Waiting all along

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Tuesday, August 01, 2006 in
She sat in anxiety, waiting for her beloved,
Days crossed plenty, emotions vast and myriad.
Said he-"I'll be back soon"
She kept waiting, never did come soon.

The last step towards the point of no visibility,
Words played traitors to their own hearts
The sharp sting of seperation like darts
Was too ravenous to counter their patient ability.

Bound they still were by words of hope,
Times were getting tough and hard to cope
Having lost their self to the other,
Still she waits, with just words to smother.


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27

Special Somethings

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Friday, July 28, 2006
I wanted this to be really special. I was thinking of a different way to put this up. I squeezed my pea-sized brain for ideas. The thought always lingered at the back of my head, no matter how important other things were. But still the ideas remained constipated in my mind.
Everytime I thought I had something good in the process, the thought failed to mature beyond a certain level and I would be back to the same place with a blank head. The thought my blog turning into a Nothings & more Nothings led me to desperation. I started to feel guilty that I was doing injustice to this space. I would religiously visit this baby of mine everyday, look at the shoutbox which has now successfully transformed into a spambox. The statcounter was going good. The comments were less, but steady.
And now at the end of it all this sounds like utter fiction and probably crap too.
But this milestone is special to me.
Yes, this is my 100th post !


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14

Decisions

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Sunday, July 23, 2006
Alright, college has begun and its not half as bad as I had expected it to be. Its thrice as worse as I had expected it to be ! To start, my class is located in the middle of nowhere with fans that creak with every revolution, a bench that is a perfect example of frictional force, a board on which no writing done with chalk can be seen (who looks at the board anyways) and a whole bunch of jokers who call themselves as lecturers and handle the world's most boring subjects. I seated myself comfortably next to a window in one of the back benches and of course I needn't tell you what I do all day! I have so much non-academic work to do once I reach home, so I compensate on my sleep at college and during the tediously long bus journey. Anyways, in the last 3 days, I've decided that I have to get used to this lifestyle atleast for the next 3 years. There are zillion other things that are more worthy than academics and I'm not going to let this boring college life affect the other entities. I am what I am and I shall be what I want to !

Amen !

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12

Variety is the spice of life

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Thursday, July 13, 2006
A lot has been written in the blogsdom about the blasts in Bombay, I've not got more to add than what already has been told. The Mumbaikar spirit flames up and engulfs all the misery and fights back with an undying passion. I was more worried about a relative who commutes by the rail mode and the moment we got the news that she was held up at work and had to take the next train, we calmed ourselves down. Cosmic vibrations I'd call it or maybe sheer luck.
On a much different note, here is a friend who takes me for inspiration to join the blogger community. Welcome aboard Krithika. And as for that inspiration, I'm sure, after spending considerable amount of time in the blog world, you'll have a longer list of inspiration !! (:p)
And my personal life is going towards zilch. College reopens in a week's time and the feeling that I've done nothing worthwhile haunts me again. But I've enjoyed the last 2 weeks really well. I met a few long lost friends, consoled a few, sorted out a misunderstanding and almost salvaged something very dear to me from disaster.

P.s :- I'm looking at a template change if not atleast a few noticeable changes. Change is good !

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10

The Unsung Girl

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Monday, July 10, 2006
7 year old Nandana walked into her contemporary duplex house with a beatific smile on her face. The reason for the big grin was clenched tightly in her little fist. A cup testifying her first place in the singing competition held in her school. She walked in screaming- "Amma, ammaaaa, where are you?" Probably amma hadn't returned from office yet. She ran to the telephone and dialed the ten digit cell phone number. "The person you are trying to call is currently not reachable" repeated the electronic voice. Nandana called up her father's office next - "Daddy, I won the first prize today" she exclaimed excitedly
"That's good darling, now I'm a little busy, we'll talk later baby"
She hung up with a long sigh took the cup upstairs to her disabled grandmother's room. Nandana never liked the room. It smelt of dettol and had the most dull and vapid interiors unlike the rest of the house.
But the moment Nandana walked in, her grandmother stretched her arms out and said - " I knew you'd win Nandu, I'm so proud of you my angel ! Will you sing once again for your grandmother?"

And the smile that was swept off from Nandana's face a few minutes back, lit up the entire room as she sang for her grandmother.

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12

The Stare

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Thursday, July 06, 2006
After a 6 year long wait, Radhika's sister was getting married. Radhika was seated close to the dais looking at the proceedings. She was tired of the multiple rituals before the the holy nuptial knot was tied. People came and went. She was looking at them all until her eyes settled on this man seated diagonally across her. She had never seen him before. Probably the groom's relative, she thought. She gave him a warm smile and he returned it.
She turned her gaze towards the dais. Her sister was smiling ever so quaintly at her husband to be. They made such a cute pair, she thought.
Radhika looked again in his direction, and their gazes met.
He was looking at her constantly. Her heart started to beat out of its cage, everytime someone looked at her that way. He'd never seen anyone like her before. Her appearance tugged his heartstrings. She felt uneasy about his obscure stare. He took out his handkerchief and patted his forehead. A few moments later someone whispered something into his ears and she noticed his mouth curve into an "oh".

Who wouldn't feel sympathetic when you are a quadruple amputee?

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21

Summing it up

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Wednesday, June 28, 2006
A year back, a teenager was introduced to blogging by her friend. She was enthusiastic to get her cryptic mind to churn out some quality stuff and the thought of personal cyber space was way too exciting for her. There she sat, reading all the blogs that her friend had suggested. There were quite some good writers out there and they were really serious about what they put up on their blogs. She started thinking if she would be able to do justice to her space. She didn't want this to be yet another blog. She never liked being a face in the crowd.
But something propelled her to start one, and she started writing on a daily basis. She waited for comments. There came none. She crazily bloghopped and very sincerely left a comment on their posts. Then she started believing that she wrote only for herself and it mattered only to her. A few friends commented religiously on every post. But there were a few who would comment, only if you commented on theirs. Ha! Slowly she forgot about the comments. It didn't matter much to her.
She decided that her blog would testify her transition. Later she added statcounters, put up a shoutbox, enrolled for the google adsense for the technological transition. She made some real good friends and learnt a lot in the process of keying in those posts. There are lots of things that made no sense to the world, but meant a lot to her.

Today she sits here typing her 93rd post on the day of her blog's first birthday.

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17

End of a year

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Thursday, June 22, 2006
Aug 24th 2005.
That day is etched in my mind. The day I walked into my campus with a totally apprehensive mind. New place, new people, unfamiliar territories, it was a new beginning. I had my doubts if I would be able to manage all this. Is engineering for me? Its a rat race that I'm joining. I would still be a rat at the end of it. I put aside all these thoughts. It was hard to not let them haunt me.I missed my friends from school, I hated it all. I began to rue my fate.
But then I've grown to accept all this and do note, I'm not saying that I'm liking it. I've just gotten used to it. Semester one passed by and in semester 2 I again started doubting if I had made a mistake. But then all this is over. I've got to finish my course and get a life of my own. I've climbed 2 rungs in the engineering ladder and in the process have learnt a lot of things. Am mentally, academically, physically, spiritually an year older and atleast definitely possess a maturity level higher than what I did last year.
And this blog will stand testimonial of all this.


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14

Lost relationships

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Sunday, June 18, 2006 in
Sumana was the single mother of a 14 year old Riya. The unexpected demise of her husband in a plane crash had nearly swept the ground from beneath her feet. She was struggling in the moribund city life to cater to her daughter's education expenses and other needs. Being an advocate didn't have many monetary advantages.
She fought cases and solved almost everyone's problems, but was quite unaware of what was happening in her own house.
Riya had grown up all by herself. She longed for her mother's affection, but Sumana was too busy making ends meet that she was resorted to communicating with her daughter through calls and notes pinned on the fridge. The rift started widening slowly. Riya secluded herself from everyone. Nobody bothered about her. Everyone only seemed to care, no one really did. Her life was so neatly messed up now that nobody could set it right.
Then he came. Slowly, stealthily, like a crook. She smiled at him, he smiled back. Riya was happy that atleast he came to her. She spilled her heart out to him. He proved to be a patient listener. She embraced him and found her peace. Eternal peace.
Sumana cried as she lost her daughter and only hope in life. Death, again! How would she survive this one now?

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17

Bloody environment *updated*

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Thursday, June 08, 2006
Update:- Thank you all for your sympathies. My thumb is fine now. Environmental engg was the only paper where I had so much to write and I wasn't able to write. Now my thumb is fine and I can write, but have nothing to write. Makes no sense eh? Bah! Exams finishing on 15th. Lots of posts in mind, let's see how many materialize.

Lady luck has always conspired against me in times of need. It is only yesterday that I posted here about me writing a long paper on the environment. Minutes after posting I jammed my right thumb between the lift doors and sported a nice cut behind my thumb nail. After a long tirade from mom on being more careful atleast during exams, I settled down with the book in my lap. I took out a paper and tried writing. The wound stung and I winced in pain. I left it at that and
started to rue my fate.
The moment I saw the question paper today morning, my hopes soared! I actually knew most of the answers. Now came the tricky part, I had to write. I held the pen, took a deep breath and started on with what Genetic Diversity meant. It wasn't bad, the wound had healed partially. I swooshed my way through almost all the long answers. That's when the bleeding began. Damn! My bandaid had came off and my palm was sweaty. I had a full section remaining with 10 questions. I wiped my hands on the tissue I had. Blood again. But the tissue was doing a good job of sealing the wound. I managed to put in the key points and submitted a blood stained paper.
Bloody paper that was! Sheesh!

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10

I realise

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Thursday, June 01, 2006
"When things seem unsure, anxiety heightens."

I've realised a few things in life are worth nothing at all.
I've realised people who really love you, never show it.
I've realised words can never express the inner feelings, tears can.
I've realised people close to you, don't really care, its the ones who are unknown are farther.
I've realised that its taken me 18 years to realise so much!

But better late than never !

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8

Burn them off

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Thursday, May 25, 2006
I can't believe I'm actually blogging about something I had dismissed as unimportant a few years back. Health and Nutrition it is. People who know me might actually raise an eyebrow at me talking about this, but I really don't know the reason for this sudden epiphany ! I had never been a skinny girl. I was healthy with no ailments except for a high tendency to get my bones broken once a year! (:p) The first 12 years of my life was spent in Delhi and I actually started adding some flesh only after my first major fracture in Chennai. But then dance classes helped me keep fitness where it was supposed to be. But of lately with no more dance, I've been forced to take up activities like aerobics and enrolling in a gym to keep that flesh in place. Dietary control is something I can never handle. Leafy or fat-free foods don't interest me and chocolate and ice-creams are something that only saints can avoid !
So according to me the only way is to fight those calories off is to burn them ! I hope I stick to this routine atleast. I'm so fickle-minded!!

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15

Set Top Box

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Sunday, May 21, 2006
It all began with me asking my dad to get the set top box installed two years back. The Shahrukh Khan festival was going to be telecast for one whole week. Not a valid reason. Fine,Star World was going to air the last season of F.R.I.E.N.D.S. Cliched eh? I know. I'm a friends(the soap) fanatic. And Michelle was growing older on Full House. I know all this sounds so indolent and my father put me off by asking me to prepare for my board exams!
Now today if I go back to him with the same plea, he'll turn me down saying that the government is planning to take the system off and its wiser to wait. I have started to depend upon DD ,Sahara and Pogo to watch movies!!!!!

And I have to mention the climate here. Boy! Isn't it weird? A few months back, we had water running like rivers on the roads and now a weeks back it was scorching. The heat is slightly showing signs of abatement. Or is the sun playing peek-a-boo??

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26

Love is

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Thursday, May 18, 2006 in
After all those encouraging comments, and my own addiction to blogging , I really couldn't stay away from this. I'm coming back with a poem and yes this is just a feeling not an experience !

Love is smiles
Love is tears
Love is full of doubts & fears

Love is cruel
Love is kind
Love is very hard to find

Love is near
Love is far away
Love is not about being together all day

Love is slow
Love is fast
Love is always there to last

Love is about being daring
Love is about being bold
Love is more precious than gold

Love can succeed
Love can fail
Love is like a fairy tale

Love is a reality
Love is like a dream
Love is so beautiful & serene

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17

Last post?

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Tuesday, May 16, 2006
The last few days were really testing times for me. I was on a emotional high but now am slowly riveting back to normal. But I have no hopes that things are going to be the same way any longer. I've grown to assume that anything good that happens to me comes with a big price which I can't afford. Life's becoming monotonous, posts seem mundane. This blog is probably breathing its last moments... HOPE is such a misleading word.

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15

Mad Rush

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Wednesday, May 10, 2006
"When the world gives you a thousand reason to cry, show the world that you have a million reasons to smile"
Procrastination is my middle name. I wish I had done things earlier. I'm running a race against time. Trust me it feels as if I'm walking against an approaching storm. Its all rosy and silent, until the mad wind comes and devastates everything in its way.
Tomorrow happens to be the last working day of my semester and also happens to be Day 1 of events of one of my most closest cousin's wedding. I have no other choice than to miss the function in the morning and get all my records signed. I'm so glad that Friday is a holiday and I would not miss the tying of the nuptial knot. I have my model exams starting this Saturday. That's like 7 exams in 3 days.
After that the university practical begins, followed by my university theory exams from 28th. Blogger isn't going to see much of me for a while. I'll be back after a brief hiatus. I need a lot of moral support and the courage to face all this. And yes I see a moment for the Prayer Club to be conjured!

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20

Tales Redefined

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Monday, May 08, 2006
I got reminded about the tale of the hat vendor and the monkeys as I was crusading along East Coast Road last night. I know there is no relation between the both, lets just assume I decided to think about monkeys and the first thing that popped into my mind was the story about the hat vendor and the monkeys ! We're all familiar with that right? Well, let me add a sequel to it.

40 years after the death of that hat seller, his grandson takes on the legacy. He works really hard and makes better hats.On a hot summer afternoon he too falls asleep under the same tree which once provided shade to his grandfather. When he woke up, as expected the hats were gone! Ah! His grandfather had told him what to do, he removed his hat and pelted it on the floor. Much to his astonishment, the monkeys didn't do so. One of them came running down the tree and told the hat vendor which left him boggled.
The monkey said -
" I had a grandfather too who told me what to do !"


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18

I know not

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Thursday, May 04, 2006
Poetic words escape me,
I know not what to write,
I'm working harder than ever
My schedule is very tight.

I wonder what to post after so many days,
Imaginations are gone without a trace,
Ideas do seem to mound,
But nothing that is profound.

I know not what else to say,
Attention to other work, I need to pay,
Do pardon me, its the heat of May,
I shall be back soon with something better to say.

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16

I'm going

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Wednesday, April 26, 2006
"All my bags are packed and I'm ready to go...." croon the Aerosmith band on my player. I think my player has earned my sixth sense, being with me. It seems to select the right song according to my moods.
Anyways, for all those of you who just let out a big sigh of relief thinking I'm going, save it ! I'm just going to college after a long long long leave. I won't call it vacation. It seems as if the weekend was just extended for a few weeks. After week 1 of sulking, week 2 of planning, week 3 of disappointments and week 4 of fun ! Yes, that's exactly how I spent a month! All the fun came at the last moment, making me want more of it and now I sit hopelessly and totally uninspired to attend college tomorrow.
One half of my mind says that I have just 20 more working days and I should give it my best coz I've had enough. The other half screams that it wants more fun ! I have no idea which one to listen to.
I've no other choice than to attend college for those 20 days, but this reckless attitude isn't going to help me!

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22

A Priceless pack of Garbage

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Monday, April 24, 2006
Why is it always difficult to get rid of something as trivial as a withered flower or a pen that no longer writes or anything that has some close significance to you?
I was de-cluttering my shelf today, and I found a sizable number of a myriad of things that I didn't want to throw away.Ranging from old slam books, post-it pages, a few diaries to broken stationary, a ripped toy and lots more... The things that I did not want to throw away seemed to outgrow in number than the things that I actually did part with. As I flip my old diaries, I can almost visualize myself living in those moments and the transitional change that I've undergone. I also got hold of a few tapes in which the conversation between my cousins had been recorded. I was almost ROTFL when I heard their squeaky voices and not to leave out my guffaw and snide remarks in between.
The broken or useless branded goodies might clutter my house, but the memories that I can associate with each one of those paraphernalia is absolutely priceless.

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6

Unfair

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Saturday, April 22, 2006
Lets rewind a bit.
Let me take you 7 years down memory lane. Its a breezy evening of August. Its around 9 in the evening. We get a call from a frantic cousin who asks us to come over to their place right away that's just a stone's throw away from our house. My parents and I rush over. The porch light is off. Strange. The drawing room was rearranged. Strange again. I went in first and stood transfixed in my steps. There was a absolutely amazingly cuddly, drooling, tottering fawn colored Labrador pup trying to walk its way from one end of the hall to another. I was literally dumbstruck. My affection and love for dogs surfaced immediately. I learnt from my grinning cousin that the pup was a month old. The fella (pup) could hardly walk and kept landing on his belly for every 2 steps that he advanced. He was already showing signs of being obdurate and adamant as my uncle tried to coax him to drink his doggy syrup. Cerelac wasn't helping either. He was christened "Teddy".
Fast forward to the present.
My aunt and uncle have moved to a new flat from their independent house. And Teddy doesn't like the change. He feels restricted. There is no place for him to move about and keeps sniffing the new place. The change is pretty hard for him. The crammed 3 bedroom apartment with its furniture doesn't fancy him, he seems to want space. Today I'm furious to know that, a few members of the apartment's association approached my uncle and have asked them to give away Teddy. The reason? He barks. What nonsense? The kid upstairs who wails all day goes unnoticed. But a dog isn't allowed to stay for a simple reason that he barks? Its absurd. I feel like shooting the guy who came and said that -"get rid of ur dog, he's too loud". Well is he ever going to understand that it will take anyone for that matter to accustom themselves to a change? And its just a dog. Doesn't anyone sympathize with the other living species? I'm appalled by this reckless attitude of certain souls in this world. I'm ashamed too that I coexist with such heartless creatures! Bah! I can't stand the idea of Teddy going to Blue Cross. Where will those pets go if such absurd rules are brought about in apartments-
Do we send dogs and cats to the zoos?

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14

Of blogs and comments

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Friday, April 21, 2006
My mind is clogged and I know not what to blog!
So, let me tell you the story of how I brought my blog back from the kiss of death ! (:p)

About 2 years back there was an article in the newspaper about blogs in detail with a few specified links. I was excited about having my own space on the world wide web and crapping about all that I wanted to. But then when I visited those links, I was flabbergasted. People were writing sensible stuff !! I thought I should stick to my good ol' journal and hit that "back" button in the top left corner. I didn't want people to start thinking - "How could such nutcases come and just blab away here?" Bah! Ignorance !!
An year later, a super cool friend of mine, with whom I happen to share similar interests, gives me the link to his blog and asks me to comment. Well, I still remember that post of his about kids who sold those yellow dusters at traffic signals. I was thoroughly touched.
A month later I create my own blog and start writing. Exams come up and I forget all about blogs. After the exams I decide to rekindle my blog and I realize that I've forgotten my username, pwd and even the name of my blog!! (talk abt irresponsibility) I created another account. After more than a year of owning an idle blog, I start posting. What I had when I began this post (Writer's Block) had caught me then too.
A week later I post a poem I had written over 10 years ago, and these 2 totally unknown fellas leave a comment behind. My eyes were literally out of their sockets when I thought that ppl had actually read that and commented?!?!
And today, I qualify very well to make this cliched statement -
"... and the rest is history " ( I feel like a cinema star) (lol!)

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10

Rue the fate

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Friday, April 14, 2006
In this sad world of ours, sorrow comes to all and often it comes with bitter agony.
Perfect relief is not possible, except with time.
You cannot believe that you will ever feel better, but this is not true.
You are bound to be happy again
Knowing this and truly believing it, this will make you less miserable now.
- Abraham Lincoln

The above verse was just a reassurance to myself that things will get better.
My trip got cancelled due to some personal reasons. Guess am back to being jobless at home till college reopens.
A very happy and prosperous tamil new year to all of you !

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9

Bye

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Tuesday, April 11, 2006
Bye Bye Bloggers and Non-Bloggers who visit me here.

I'm going away until Sunday on a trip with my cousins. Considering the fact that I was sitting jobless for so long and was making life miserable for everyone at home, I jumped at the offer my cousin gave me to accompany him. Its been pretty much a long time since I went out of the city, so the change is most welcome!!! So no posts for the next 5 days.
And of course I won't be around for Tamil New Year, so here's me wishing all of u, a wonderful Tamil New Year !

Disclaimer: Comments asking for pictures or travelogues will not be entertained. Comments like We will miss you are most welcome !! : )

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21

My 1st Fracture

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Sunday, April 09, 2006
May 8th 1999
It was a fine day with a light breeze and a perfect evening to play. My enthusiasm for playing and love for outdoors took me to Guindy Park a few years back with a bunch of family friends. After spending considerable time on the swing and glider, I moved onto the monkey bar. I wanted to show my friends how strong I was despite my skinny appearance. I started my climb.The wind was singing slow hums and my side locks were being swept into my eyes. I felt as if I were flying . I tried in vain to push them aside with one hand, but by that time I had reached the centre of the bar. My other palm clamped with sweat lost its grip on the bar and I fell 6 feet to the ground and landed hard on my right hand.

There was no pain at all. But the moment I looked at my hand, the set of bones linking the thumb to the fore arm felt squishy. It looked alienish with my thumb hanging loosely without the support from the adjacent bone. I rushed to my friend's mother and showed her my arm. She gasped and before I could ask anything else, I was whisked off to the orthopedic centre. My parents came rushing to the hospital. The moment my mom saw my boneless arm under the X-Ray machine, she got hysterical and the nurse had to sedate her to calm her down!!
In the Operation Theatre all I remember was a sharp prick on my unharmed left arm and
some lady placing a mask on my face. I was asked to inhale deeply. I did feel funny at that moment. A ticklish sensation ran through my spine. I don't know if it was due to the cold metal table I was lying on or the anesthesia.
When I woke up I felt groggy and I imagined a dozen people around me.Someone was patting my head. Some instrument was attached to my finger. I thought I was hallucinating. But a few minutes later my head cleared and indeed there were a dozen people in the room staring at me and that was a pulse counter on my finger !

2 days later I was sent home with a huge PoP bandage covering my entire hand. I had to visit the doctor once a week and had to get my plaster replaced thrice.
The worst part was, I wasn't able to write even after the final crepe bandage had been removed. But the best part was that for those 3 months, I was given royal treatment at home !!

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17

Record a thon

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Tuesday, April 04, 2006
With less than a month for the university exams and less than a fortnight for the practical exams, I realized from posting the last entry that deadlines for the record submission are nearing. Now that means I have to write a abysmally long screed called Records!!
Circuit theory with its kolam like diagrams and calculations that run to pages. Oh ! I hate this !
Electronic Devices with its diagrams that make no sense and graphs that look really amusing on the lab manual but the way they turn out in the observation is totally absurd. I've been manipulating every graph value to get atleast something similar to the one drawn in the lab manual.! Hmph!
The terrible part in this whole process is that, none of these labs belong to my department. I just have to do it for the sake of proceeding to the next semester.
And so I began my record a thon and still I'm on.
Wurshtesht nelamai !

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26

Deadlines

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Saturday, April 01, 2006
Why is it always that when the deadline nears, you remember that so much of work is pending? Well, you can ask what were you doing all these days? But then time passes so swiftly that one moment you feel bored that you don't have anything constructive to do or feel like doin and laze around the whole day. But then suddenly one fine morning you realise about all that is left to do, and you blame all in the vicinity for it !
Well anyways, I attained this enlightenment over my 2 hour telephonic conversation with a friend.

P.s: Attention spammers, I have removed Word Verification coz it started generating sentences instead of a few alphabets. Now if u fellas are gonna be back, well, what more could I do, I'll enable it back on !!

Anyways despite all that is left to do, am off to watch Kuch Kuch Hota Hai on TV now ! Hail Doordarshan !

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17

Mainland China

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Friday, March 31, 2006
Making plans within the click of a finger is what my dad is known for. Suddenly at 8 pm he says we're having chinese food tonight !
I'm not a food connoisseur, but then I couldn't stop myself from posting this from the dinner I had last night.
The decor with its soft lighting and a few touches of contemporary Chinese paintings and motifs were found everywhere. The waiters in their smartly clad black chic dresses glide effortlessly between the tables and catering to all your needs.
The spiced lettuce, sugary cucumber and the Chinese tea which is nothing more than warm water boiled with cloves and mint is on every table as a compliment.
Being a vegetarian can be quite a hindrance when it comes to Chinese food. We had Crispy corn and golden potatoes as starters along with Sweet corn veg soup. I couldn't stop myself on those corns and got half full by the time we reached the main course. Well, the main course turned out to be Garlic and Capsicum Fried rice with Hakka noodles in Schezwan sauce. Teamed with all this was a Munchoorian dipped in sweet n sour sauce. Truly mouth watering!!!
By the time dessert came, I was sure I would not eat for the next 2 days atleast.
But when I saw Daarsaan (thick flattened fried noodles bathed in honey) along with butterscotch ice-cream. I forgot about all that I had eaten.
The bill and the stomach was content and I must say the service is really good. So if you Chennaites have a inkling for Chinese food, we can boast of Mainland China !

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15

Chetan

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Wednesday, March 29, 2006 in
It was one of the very important days in his life. Chetan had been waiting for this day for a long while. As the day neared, he found himself striking off days on the calendar in his room. As he looked around his room, he saw all those things he had so proudly owned till now. He had a long way to go ahead, but still. There was no more room for the past. It was time.
His parents had carefully looked into the nitty-gritty of the party details. A banquet hall in one of the most posh hotels in the city was booked and even the decor and food was selected according to his choice.
They made sure that Chetan would not have anything to worry about that evening. They wanted everything to be perfect.
It was already 6 pm. Chetan went into the shower and rubbed himself squeaky clean. As he descended the stairs of the hotel, he looked absolutely stunning in his navy suit ,a light blue shirt and a shade darker blue tie and shiny twin tone shoes.

The party lasted only for 2 hours, but Chetan's parents decided it was a triumph afterall. The children ate too much of the Mickey Mouse cake and puked all over the Persian rug, they fought over the toys and cried themselves hoarse when their balloons burst.
Despite all this
Chetan tried his best to be a perfect host, handling himself with great dignity and aplomb. What more could you expect from a child on his 3rd birthday party ?

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15

To thatha, with love

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Sunday, March 26, 2006
Today as I see this little girl and her grandfather play in the park I'm reminded a lot of my Thatha. I've spent most of my time with my grandparents than parents, hence my partiality to this man. A multi-faceted person that he was, would be able to talk with a 6 yr old and a 60 yr old on any topic under the sun. He was unorthodox yet had us stick to our culture and ethics. He has been my inspiration, role model, teacher, philosopher, guide and the best of all a real good friend.
Love for music.
Enthusiasm for writing.
Passion for books.
These 3 things that he passed onto me, now form a major 2/3rds of my life.
His morning prayers still linger in my ears.
The way he used to call me his princess.
The long walks in the Delhi parks that he used to take me for.
The manner in which he used to make me recite poems. (My love for poems continues)
His major attraction towards stationary and art forms had us musing in Landmark for hours together.
His fervour for experimenting new things.

So much unsaid, but then I'm sure the next 4 words will explain it all.
"I Miss You Thatha"

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15

Full House

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Friday, March 24, 2006
After 3 consecutive polambal posts, I realised that this place is starting to seem like a cribbing forum and Somethings & Nothings will ultimately become Nothings & more Nothings if I don't stop it. So am back to my cheery disposition despite all the crap happening around me and the temperature on the rise in Chennai.
Now that I've got so much time on me; I seem to be spending most of it usefully by sleeping, playing, listening to music, watching my newly acquired season of Full House and trying my best to finish reading the Lord of the Rings.
My cousin gifted me all the 4 LOTR books for my birthday and I've been trying my best to get past page 75 of book one. I never seem to be having this problem with any other book (even my college books). Guess I'm going to ditch it and get back to watching Full House.

Awww, Michelle is so cute and did I mention John Stamos looks just awesome. *drool*

p.s: All of you who owe me a birthday gift for the last 18 years, get me those google amukks.

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23

Ashes

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Tuesday, March 21, 2006 in
Words are lost,
Uncertainity prevails,
And all is reduced to ashes
.
.
When will the Phoenix appear?

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14

Physics

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Sunday, March 19, 2006
This day, last year. I was done with my board exams and was way too busy attending strenuous yet redundant AIEEE classes for 6 hours at a stretch everyday.
But I remember with what fidelity I attended my Physics tuition classes. Almost the whole of Psbb (my school) used to attend Mr.Sundaresan's classes. He was a great disciplinarian and punctuality was something he insisted more than studies. We were made to go back home in case we were late even by a minute. Completion of assignments on time and scoring above 65% in the class tests was mandatory. All of us used to dread his assignment discussion classes, where he would randomly ask people to give the answers to the given problems. If you hadn't solved the question, you had to submit the same problem done about 20 times.Another thing that I always admire about him is the way he remembers the name of each an every student who attended his class. (80 per batch and there were 2 batches per year)
More than the knowledge that he passed on, the passion for the subject that he imbibed in each one us was terrific. I used to loathe Physics until my 10th standard. But today I owe everything that I learnt in those 2 years to him. Be it, Punctuality, Moral Values, Principles and of course the love for the subject !

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11

Rang De

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Friday, March 17, 2006 in
Thanks people, All your wishes have materialized atleast momentarily for me !
Today's exam was cancelled and tomorrow has been declared a holiday. (Yaaay! ) I feel better too. Is that a silver lining in the clouds ??
Now I hope that I don't have 3 exams on Monday!

In the midst of all those exams and over-worked schedule of mine, I found time to play around with some colors. Yup! Holi celebrations with friends and neighbours. I wasn't able to play for long, but I managed to get my blue shirt, face, hands, nails and ears turn pink.
I've tried my best to scrub it all out, but as always it takes 3 days or more.

Like whatever King Midas touched, turned into gold.... that day whatever I touched turned pink, which includes my neighbour's cute little doggie too!!

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11

Hectic

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Thursday, March 16, 2006 in
Almost 12 hours at college
Mid-term exams after college hours on consecutive days
5 hours of sleep
A sore throat
Fever
Experience is all that I have to gain withstanding all this.

Life just ain't just too rosy at this moment !
The times ahead will bring better moments.... I hope!

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15

Back?

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Sunday, March 12, 2006 in
After a week long of what was called self-deserved leave. I'm going back to college tomorrow. The next few weeks are going to be really hectic and with my 1st year of engineering coming to an end with mid-May, I'm just too glad to be getting rid of a lot unwanted theory papers.
Just to chronicle all those agonizing moments with
*Useless Engineering Drawing in Semester one
*Boring Enivronmental Engg in Semester two that proved as Poetry writing sessions for me
*Complex Circuit Theory
*Bidding Physics and Chemistry adieu with this sem. yaay!
*I hate Math syndrome continues
All classes are going to be resumed in full swing, so posts might become irregular. Oh! how I wish I could let this moment last forever.
Do take care of my blog and shoutbox.

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26

The Beach

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Monday, March 06, 2006 in
Vinay was one guy who was never able to look at a girl and speak a few coherent words. He was brought up that way, his life void of girls. His interests were nothing more than Sports and his dear friends. All through the day he used to roam around the city on his bike. Neither Vinay nor his friends could ever imagine that one day he would fall in love. But the inevitable happened.
Sunanda was the daughter of Vinay's father's really close friend. She had grown up watching him. Sunanda was the most trustworthy person her friends could ever come across. Never did she believe that she would be liked by any boy despite several proposals that she dutifully declined. Vinay always held a special place in her heart. But then, she never had the guts to ask him. Now was her chance.
She stood at the beach, her long wavy hair being blown in all directions by the salty wind. She had checked her mobile's display screen for 2 things umpteen times in the last few minutes; a call from Vinay and secondly the time. He was late already. She was getting nervous. It was his first ever moment with a girl alone. She wanted him to be comfortable around her. Ah! Finally, he appeared like a speck at the bend around the corner. Her heart started racing. Her eyes followed him on his bike. He had crossed the place where she was standing. Damn all those instructions that she gave him about where she'd be standin! He parked his bike a few yards away and marched his last few steps to a relationship where he lost his single title. He still didn't have the guts to look up at her. He dragged the last few steps with his head bent. He knew it was now or never. He looked up and saw the girl he had been silently admiring all his life. She hadn't changed a bit.
Do I deserve her? Will she be happy with me? Does she like me at all? All these questions were answered by those longing eyes and that smile on her lips.

P.s: Long time since a romantic post, that's why !

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5

Amoha

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Thursday, March 02, 2006
Yesterday is History
Tomorrow is a Mystery
Today is a gift, that's why we call it the Present !

And so goes the tag line of the following gifting site.

www.amohagifts.com

Kudos to my aunt who conceived the idea and materialised it all by herself.
Spread the word ppl !

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17

The X Factor

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Friday, February 17, 2006 in
Suresh had been married for the last 20 years. His was a small family with his wife, son and an ageing father. All of them were going through a very delicate phase in their lives. Each one facing a different sort of trouble magnified in their own way.
Suresh's father had spent over a month in the hospital after being diagnosed with Cancer. The Chemotherapy making him weaker day by day. But he didn't lose hope. He kept fighting against his illness.
Despite being from the upper middle-class society strata, Suresh was bogged down by debts and he had none to share his burden either. He was working overtime and pushed his last penny to keep his family intact. The once bright and radiant face of Suresh's had baggy eyes, dark circles and lines of tension engraved across the forehead.
Suresh's wife Gayathri was running between 2 worlds. She was the submissive, gullible, soft-spoken, responsible home-maker
. Gayathri was a person who struck a terrific balance between work and family.
Suresh's son was the apple of his eye. He would do anything for him. He was attempting his board exams in a month's time. The tense atmosphere at home didn't come to his rescue either.
Suresh was in a state of mental imbalance with so many things on his mind. His brain simply refused to co-operate with him anymore. The pressure was building up.
One fine morning, after visiting his recovering father in the hospital, he came to his cabin in his office and saw this one mail from his friend that just said -

" Hope is all we have when everything falls apart, Use it well ! "

That was the magical phrase. It shed light on a lot of void space in his mind. A whole new vista opened, showing him numerous ways. Energy multiplied. Plans propped up in his mind. Hope gushed its way into him, reaching every cell, every neuron in his body. All because he had forgotten that one word that now added so much meaning to his life now, H O P E !

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16

End of a beginning

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Monday, February 13, 2006
All the fun, high spirits, screaming, bunking, and the unusual routine has taken a U-turn and has bid adieu for this year. Lethargy has started to creep in and books seem to alienic. Sitting in class for the whole day seemed so wierd.
Adventure comes in the form of an Electrical Workshop Lab which I've started dreading now. With all those big big instruments and complicated circuits, I sit looking nonplussed with a bunch of bulbs and wires in my hand. If I had more hands, they would be found tugging my hair in all direction. My partner in crime is no better either. So ultimately at the end of the 3rd hour, I somehow figure out what to do and manage to get my observation book signed after several entries in the breakage list.
It seems exams have been advanced this semester due to the elections. Accepted that college days will not return again, but then I feel its time to move on.

Life is just too melancholy and monotonous now.

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9

Cultural 06

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Saturday, February 11, 2006 in
The busy days have finally come to an end. When have good things lasted long? Hmph!
I witnessed my first ever college- level cultural show yesterday. It was our college culturals and unlike the other institutions, we compete between our own departments. The competition is on par as the population is pretty large with more than 15 departments. Each department is given 40 mins to showcase their talent. There are the Highlight Performances apart from that, which is supposed to be the best.
We, the freshers perform as a separate team and are always the 1st to perform. That always gives us an advantage to look at the rest of the show uninterrupted.
I must say, the stage was simply mind-blowing, the DJ playing Fanaa in between performances, and the list of the chief guests was exciting as always. Gracing the occassion with their presence were the following stars-
1) Grace Karunas with her Seena thaana had the crowd dancing and screaming for more.
2) Srikanth who said that he didn't even attend his own college's culturals and came to ours.
3) Suchitra, who sang a fusion of all her songs and wrapped up with the cliched "Semma hot machi "
4) Chinni Jayanth who sang Aalavandhan, his 1st musical debut on a stage and of course he mimicked Rajni and Kamal.
5) And finally a bear like Dhanush, who passed on the words of wisdom given to him by Superstar.

The show began at 8.30 in the morning and went non-stop and ended at 10 at night. Atleast for me it worth all the tiring hours through the week as my department won the overall championship and also the Most Creative Performance Title. It sure was a delightful moment when they announced that -
"The Department of Information Technology wins the Overall Championship for the third consecutive year"
Screams, Howls, Whistles, Drumrolls, Claps and the numerous voices that cheered and yet were heard as one.

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16

Netru Indru Naalai

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Tuesday, February 07, 2006
When there is a combination like Mani Ratnam, Sabu Cyril, Rajiv Menon and Vasanth, you just can't cook up excuses. As expected, the set was magnificent and majestic at the huge Jeppiar College grounds.
The show was late by an hour, the introduction being a recorded video that had Revathy thanking a long list of people. The black and white stage was graced by a huge projector screen in the background that sported different pictures, sometimes even motion pictures as backdrops for every performance apart from the huge theme prop's like bridges, pillars, swings, trees and so many more. Each theme got better as the show advanced.

The night began with a kathak dance sequence by Banupriya and moved on to 60's and 70's songs performed by Prakash Raj, Vineeth and Shreya(of Mazhai fame). Interjected was a fusion performance by danseuse Shobana. The 80's songs started with Shaam dancing to the tunes of Ilamai Idho Idho... the disco set was a marvel to the eyes. The next performance came as a shock to most of the crowd. A fat Simran and an emaciated Simbu dancing for Rakamma kaiya thattu. The jhatak matak of Simran seems to have lost its charm. But the crowd continued cheering.
The show resumed after a break to hear Blaaze sing his rap going with the theme of the night. When Blaaze sang Adankaka, the crowd went berserk. With his accent and the tongue twisting lyrics, we were more than grateful when he went back to his rap.
I'm really sorry, I attended the show only till this performance and had to get back due to an emergency.

But I must admit, Sabu Cyril had done a brilliant job. Each song had a different look. The costumes were beautiful and looked graceful when teamed with brilliant choreography by Kala and Brinda. The old songs had used minimal colors, the majority being Black, White and Red. But as the era modernised one could spot more of Gold, Pink, Blue, and more jazzy shades as it advanced to the current period.

I missed Kamal Hassan's performance!! sigh sigh.

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17

This too shall pass

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Wednesday, February 01, 2006
The last few days have seen the other side of me, the busy side. With the intra-department culturals round the corner and the sports week going on, I've been engaged in a lot of work. I have registered for so many events, that I even forgot which ones I enrolled for. The lecturers also don't seem to take pity on us and and are breezing through the syllabus in a mad rush just to finish the portions. Yep, my semester gets over by mid-April. It seems like I was cribbing about E.D just yesterday and my 1st year is about to come to an end in almost 2 months. Maybe its because of all these activities.
Today I was on my way back from college and this cute little boy hardly 3 years old comes running to me and pulls my dress down. I bend down to pick up the little fella and he asks me to take him for a walk around the apartment. :o) I agree and soon I find myself surrounded by little angels each one with a request so honest that you just can't deny them! Oh! Kids, they are such pure and wonderful souls.
Ah! But I'm reminded of all the work left in the moribund life. Nothing good ever lasts forever.
This too shall pass......

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14

Him...

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Saturday, January 28, 2006 in
He is my love,
He is my friend,
Don't mistake me about what I intend.

Distress, Joy or Anger takes me to him
Emotions about to overflow, they are reaching the brim.
Things galore he has to share,
He is one among the many about whom I care.

Numerous secrets he does hold,
Many more of them are yet to unfold.
You are reading about the one whom I told...

Mr.Bloggie is what I call him
He's my love, my sweetheart, my darling !

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15

Retro Rules !

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Thursday, January 26, 2006
As you people would have noticed, I've made minor changes in the appearance of my blog. I've made it look all monochromatic. Black and White, 2 of my most favorite colors dominate the blog along with a hint of grey here and there.
I tried finding a template that would suit my needs n tastes, but all I have is a day's time and very little patience. So, I kept the basic template and tweaked around with colors.
I also found a picture for my blog title that seemed in sync with the name "Somethings & Nothings"
Doesn't it have a retro feel to it?
Do drop in your comments and suggestions.

P.S : The cliched shoutbox also has been added. So scream away....

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15

One Two

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Tuesday, January 24, 2006
Everything in this world is created twice !
First, in the mind
And then, later before the eyes !
Dream your life
Make dreams a reality
For you deserve every moment that you live !
The best way to make your dreams come true is to
WAKE UP!

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23

Tag - 1

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Friday, January 20, 2006
Yaaay! My 1st tag!! Here goes,

6 weird/random facts about me :- (dunno how wierd they are)

1. I'm the only girl in a family of giants.
2. I like talking to dogs.
3. I can't study unless I clean my room inside out.
4. I am not home-sick!
5. I never cross my 100 SMS per day limit.
6. I mix up languages while talking. English+Hindi+Tamil+Malayalam+Telugu+ some more crap which I can't figure out myself.

I'm not the angel of mercy, but anyone who doesn't know what to post can take up this tag!

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20

Lost

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Wednesday, January 18, 2006 in ,
She felt the hands slipping away,
She struggled to hold on,
Time was not a friend this way,
She tried it all, but in vain.

He was longing to see her,
Monochromatic was his life, until she came.
The distance was not helping either,
Times can be so unpredictable like water droplets on a window pane.

State of the art technology,
Wireless communication,
Slick gadgets, nothing can ever compensate
For the times spent in recollecting the memories with a loved one.

He was gone,
She was lost and broken,
The search has just begun,
Lots to discover, boundaries to cross, feelings sunken.

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17

A new beginning

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Tuesday, January 17, 2006
With the results much to my surprise, a 85% aggregate has me grinning for the last 24 hours. So much that, even my cheeks hurt now. Anyways, with that I saw the end of a tortuous E.D. Ugh!! How I hated it. This time I've got 3 electrical lab classes, which is no way related to my department. But I'm sure anything could be better than those diagrams that I couldn't even comprehend.
We began Sem-2 today officially with MGR's birthday celebrations in our campus. Gracing the occasion were "Gabtun Vijaykanth", Director-Actor "Bagyaraj", comedian "Vivek" and a not so popular stunt master.
Guess classes would resume in full swing from tomorrow and that means getting back to a tight 11 hour schedule. Which also means, I need to wake up at an ungodly hour of 5.30 in the morning.

How I wish I could fast-forward my life!!!

Disclaimer: I barely scraped thru E.D. Just Escape!

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8

Somethings n Nothings

Posted by Ramya Shankar on Saturday, January 14, 2006
I'm being such a paradox. I'm bored of sitting at home and doing nothing, yet I don't want college to reopen on Monday. In the last one month of the so called Semester Holidays, my social life was varying from 2 to 4 on a scale of one to ten. But still I enjoyed every moment of all the nothing I had to do. And yeah, it is quite a task in itself to sit and have nothing to do. Now, I don't want to disgress by explaining how I had nothing to do, despite my sudden realisation a few days back that infact I did have quite a bunch of errands to run. I'm rushing off with those now and also trying to relish every moment.
As I sit before the eerie glow of my monitor in this wee hour, all these vivid thoughts come rushing into my mind. Had to pen them down, so do pardon me.
Hopefully, from next week, I'll be having something better to blog about considering the amount of nothings that I've posted over the last few weeks. And hey! I justified my blog title too !
Also as I delve deeper into engineering, I could do with some luck !!

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